knocks on your door

[dayflies]

• at the end of my 6th semester, which means i'm almost done with my bachelor *___* feeling insane and not like i imagine a soon-to-be bachelor degree haver would feel
• i finished writing my thesis and it went super well!! i'm very happy with it. the other day i met the old TA for my BA thesis course at the busstop and we had an exchange where she asked me how i was and i was like "kinda stressed bc of exams" and she was like "you seem like a good student and i read your paper from last semester, i don't think you have anything to worry about". :((( there is nothing in the world like a supportive teacher/TA... also i met the prof for that course the other day at the canteen and 1) I LOVE HIM AND MISS HIS CLASSES SO MUCH 2) he said hi to me!!! i feel like old profs rarely say hi to you when they see you bc they can't rmbr u or feel awkward bc they're your old prof so tbh i was very "!!!! <3<333333 !!!?!!!!". internally
• i moved out woweeee, i'm living with three other people and two of them were friends from high school. it's been a fun time!! but also lots of adjusting. one of my friends that i'm living with moved in @ the same time as me so it's def helped that i've had someone else be just as new to it as me. i've been getting to know all kinds of people bc my roommates constantly have people over, esp the two ppl who already have been living here for a good while now, gfs, friends, people who used to live here etc. etc. most of them are older than me and are at diff life stages which is also an Experience!! i feel like my horizons have widened a lol
• i can look into my neighbor's room from my own room which is super weird bc that means he can also look directly into my room. i have named him chad because he's kinda chad-like in his behavior. the other day he went outside, and then he just STOOD ON THE LAWN. CUTTING HIS NAILS. and then he walked back inside. oh chad. i do not know you but you seem so dumb and i'm kind of obsessed with it
• starting my masters in english after summer... also insane!! feeling not like i imagine a soon-to-be-masters-student would feel. i will also be ALL ALONE because all my friends from my english degree are studying their masters in english, but a different branch from me T___T they're doing an english degree where you study english plus another subject which you typically do if you plan on becoming a high school teacher, but i'm just studying pure englsih bc i do not care about anything else lol, at least enough to want to study it at uni level. so i'm a little terrified but uhm yeah, it'll be fine i hope 👍
• i'm published in the academic world and you can find me @ research gate!! very exciting times, it's always nice to see your name in print. i'd link but i dont wanna out my governement name lol.also not that anyone remembers but in my first update post i wrote that i was going to present my paper at an informal meeting and was sorta nervous about it, and it went fine. you can also find the powerpoint for that on the internet, but i unfortunately forgot to change the doc name from it's placeholder title so it's just titled uwu.pptx which is a little unfortunate but what can you do
• i pierced my ears and i'm very happy with it even though on of my piercings are acting very weird? i've been wanting to buy soo many funky earrings but i've been withholding myself
• super excited for fe3h: heroes. cannot wait to see cwaude and lysithea (and non-cwaudes and non-lysitheas)
• i've been reading lots of books which is super cool. i'm very proud of myself. here's some recs if you should fancy them:
  • the magic fish by trung le nguyen - graphic novel about the queer diaspora vietnamese experience. i cwied
  • circe by madeline miller - gorgeous prose which i expected but like. gorge <3
  • white tears, brown scars by ruby hamad - nonfiction about how white feminism harms woc
  • carmilla by j. sheridan le fanu - lesbian vampire classic
  • human acts by han kang - that quote about walking in the sun still guts me every time i think about it so that's fun
  • also i read lana del rey's poetry collection (violet bent backwards over the grass) for the lols and it was both a pleasant surprise AND everything i expected from lana del rey so. 👍
• i've also watched a ton of movies bc for some reason we have a projector at my new place, just attached to the ceiling and it obv needs to be used. recs if u fancy, pt. 2:
  • caravaggio (1986) - watch if u are into stabby gay people and hedonism
  • mommy (2014) - that one letterboxd review that's like "every time the aspect ratio changed my ass opened at the same time"
  • big time adolescence (2019) - pete davidson plays some college-aged guy whose best friend is a high school kid. it's great, he's great. ik he's kinda cringe but also HE'S GREAT IM SORRY FOR LIKING HIM. i'm cringe but free etc etc
  • interview with the vampire (1994) -  brad pitt and tom cruise play two gay vampires who adopt a daughter (TINY KIRSTEN DUNST...) and it's just. beautiful?? i still cant believe this movie is a real thing that exists
  • the handmaiden (2016) - if u for some reason haven't seen this GET TO IT?? 
  • 301/302 (1995) - women and cannibalism. yeah.
  • landscapers (2021) - most coolest gowgeousest cweativest cinematography i've seen in a long time
  • american vandal s1 (2017) - rewatched this with rory and ITS STILL SO GOOD AND SO FUNNY AND CLEVER AND THE BEST THING TO EVER EVER
• i've been listening RELIGIOUSLY to red velvets new album, it's just so good and i'm obsessed with the classical aesthetic in feel my rhythm, it's such a cool mv
• this song by vũ and this song by ngọt has also been keeping my in a chokehold, both very good, the guitar solo in may khi makes me wish i could play electric guitar
• i've been wanting to start a Real blog where i post random stuff that aren't just nonsensical braindumps and media reviews, but like... Actual stuff. not that this isn't Actual stuff but you know. i don't even check for spelling mistakes when i post here, i just do whatever i want and sometimes it's completely incoherent. will update you on that when i get there. i'm planning to put some of the prose i've posted on twt on there and maybe my interview with my mom and other stuff, i think it'll be fun!! 
• i went to vietnam by myself for two weeks to attend my cousin's wedding which was Uhm. !Eventful! (derogatory)... !!!! but also fun?? i've missed my cousins and my grandma and my cousin's kids. i have NOT missed [several redacted cans of worms than i am unwilling to open for the sake of everyone]. also, even though i didn't travel around the country as a tourist, travelling by myself has really ignited this desire to travel more,, like i've always been pretty insecure in my own ability to fend for myself, and whenever i think of travelling alone i always get weirdly anxious about running out of money or getting lost in the middle of nowhere, but now i'm sort of reassured that i'm able to be by myself?? i've always wanted to travel through vietnam as a tourist, but i'd like to see other parts of the world too!! i'm not exactly sure when i'm gonna do that but uhhhh yeah 
• LOVELY NEWS THAT ONLY I CARE ABOUT AS THE ONLY PERSON IN THE WORLD: phung khanh linh has released an album with her old songs and LIKE... [your music saved me meme]. i hate to be one of those ppl but tbh i don't really like her newer more upbeat music (the gioi khong anh is an exception. it's perfect. it is in my bloodstream. it is a part of me. also i just associate it with these very vivid memories of going on daily walks during the pandemic and watching the sunset) but her acoustic bangers like em ve troi and hay bao nang ve di, i'm... cradling them gently in my hands as big tears roll down my cheeks. #anria1stwin
• i have developed this weird fascination for the occult and cannibalism (STAY WITH ME), which tbh i've always had bc are you really a literature luvr if you haven't had an occult phase but now i'm like,, acknowledging it. not to say that i'm a human-eating devil worshipper but both things are just very fascinating?? there are all of these theories about feminism and the occult and cannibalism and tbh i'm too tired to form any coherent thots rn so i'll just leave it at that, but yeah. interesting stuff. i'm. really sorry to end this post on this note